yeah

Hey!

2006-07-05T16:16:00.000-04:00

Get out of here! Go here. Because I'm not a barista anymore.I'm on vacation.But then I'll be a law student.There are new posts just waiting for you, and a better blog design.... here.

I need a new name.

2006-06-22T22:43:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow is my last day as a barista.So Hobobarista, although I love it, rhythmically, doesn't really work, factually.I need suggestions.Hobolawstudent, though the name of my other blog, won't work for a display name.

Tittycake: an essential recipe.

2006-06-20T20:21:00.001-04:00

For my party this past weekend, I made a tittycake. You can make a tittycake, too! I used my Betty Crocker Bake 'N' Fill pan. You don't have to, but it helps.TittycakeHalf Gallon, Chocolate Ice CreamPint, Vanilla Ice CreamMini m&ms.Chocolate or Caramel SauceOreo cookies, one half-box.Chocolate chips, one half-bag.Marshmellow Fluff, one jar.Powdered Sugar, a lot.Food coloring, red and

A list of things that my boyfriend does not like about me.

2006-06-20T14:08:00.000-04:00

By Hobo BaristaAge 23.1. I leave knives around. Because I might need them again soon, and don't want to have to wash them again. But sometimes I forget. He doesn't like this.2. I use the wrong knives for the wrong tasks. I will use any knife at hand to do anything. But last week I used a proper knife to cut onions, and then I cut my fingers. So no lesson was learnt.3. I slam the toilet seat down

In this blog: Viva Bolivia!

2006-06-11T19:25:00.000-04:00

In my other blog: Post-graduation college commentary, on student loan indebtedness. I went out for Bolivian food on saturday. To "The Bolivian Restaurant" on Chalkstone avenue, in Providence. Just a stone's throw away from the Foxy Lady, one of Rhode Island's many strip clubs.What is Bolivian food?, you might ask.Imagine you're a 17 year old boy. Imagine your parents are away for the weekend. And

Further on that topic.

2006-06-04T23:23:00.000-04:00

Nerve.com featured a movie review today that touches upon something that I often talk about. The review, of a film about a teenage girl who turns out to be an abstract comic seducing and torturing an older man who turns out to be a murderous pedophile, turns out to be a feel-good romp through comforting inaccuracies about teen sexuality.The reviewer is insightful and honest; she talks about

"I cling to her innocence"

2006-06-04T15:59:00.000-04:00

That's a quote. From a story in today's Boston Globe. A mother is talking about how she'd give her daughter the new h.p.v./cervical cancer vaccine, but not tell her what it's for. This h.p.v vaccine has the potential to prevent thousands of early deaths from a sneaky cancer, that strikes mostly young women. If there were a breast cancer vaccine, there would be no controversy. Everyone wants to

Irrational Rage.

2006-06-02T01:22:00.000-04:00

Lovely.Yesterday and today were hot.Yesterday and today were quite hot, and open campus days for a local boarding school.Between yesterday and today I made more frozen blended beverages than I have ever cared to make in my life.(What's a frozen blended beverage? I thought you were a barista.)(I am a barista. But as I've discussed before, most people don't like coffee. They like fucking ridiculous

I will soon not be a hobobarista.

2006-06-01T00:02:00.000-04:00

So, soon enough, I will switch over to a new blog.Here.

Let's get some pussy!

2006-05-30T13:42:00.000-04:00

No, actually, not.Let's get some cock!On the other hand, let's really also not.Why do we say some pussy? Some cock? They're metaphors, sure. A kenning, I believe, is the term for that poetic device. Or synecdoche. Let me check. Synecdoche. Not kenning. It's a form of metynomy. Where something complex and abstract is called by one of its parts.Like saying "Turn Back, Bright Eyes" instead of "Get

An actual quote from work today.

2006-05-29T22:34:00.001-04:00

Me: Were you just on bar?Guy: Yes.Me: So this is the milk you've been serving?Guy: Yeah.Me: I will destroy you.

What I learned on my memorial day weekend.

2006-05-29T15:52:00.000-04:00

By Hobobarista.Age 23.Grade 18. The first thing I learned on my memorial day weekend is that nice girls from south suburban boston can drive into cities without sponteneously driving the wrong way up a one-way street, off a cliff, burst into flames, bounce, end up in a river, and drown because the seat belts are jammed. This is only accomplished by good directions, however. Otherwise, flaming,

Rottin' my brain, thinkin' bout sex roles.

2006-05-23T22:46:00.000-04:00

I'm watching Dr. Phil. The episode is called "The Divorce Experiment". It features a couple on the brink of divorce. The husband is a "self admitted chauvinist", the wife is a passive blonde with the lazy blue eye of the birth-injured girl next door. The relationship has been brought to this point, according to the program, by the husband's controlling nature and high demands on the wife. Dr.

Holy shit: All I need to know about psychology I learned in the promotional aisle at CVS

2006-05-16T17:20:00.000-04:00

I never understood the phrase "boggle the mind" until I went to CVS today. I was looking for a pop-up laundry hamper. They sometimes sell them in the bargain or seasonal aisle. I was walking past a display of mini-grills (hibachis and psuedo-hibachis) when I came upon something that had a peculiar neurological effect. It actually caused the neurons of my brain to pop up and rearrange to

Hobobarista's ongoing pre-graduation coverage.

2006-05-10T22:48:00.000-04:00

Today's segment: College Majors Explained.Most people believe that college majors lead to careers, in real life after college. This is not true. College majors are measures of self-identification that may lead to one of various career paths, but mostly have to do with interest, naive hopes, and who you hope to exchange various fluids with before graduation.For example, most people think that art

Pancakes!

2006-05-07T20:42:00.000-04:00

Dump the frump: Casualties of the mommy wars.

2006-05-05T10:19:00.000-04:00

First of all, I don't condone the phrase "the mommy wars". It's stupid, uncreative, and perpetuates the problem I'm about to attack.The problem I'd like to talk about today is pandemic frump. The wide, high waist-banding of American women. American women are voluntarily re-juvenilizing themselves after having children, despite the location and compensation of their major toil. American women with

I have made...

2006-05-05T05:00:00.000-04:00

a bad decision. That bad decision- to stay up, through the rest of the morning, through two classes, until three pm or so. At which time, I will be at my boyfriend's apartment, and I will crash. For a mijillion hours. In a half hour, my coffee shop will open. I'm not working, but I will visit. I will make them give me a hot chocolate. Then I will wait until it is reasonable to go to cvs, and I

Soon enough.

2006-05-01T21:01:00.000-04:00

I won't be a hobobarista anymore. I'll be a hobohobo, then a hobolawstudent. My hobo love of canned goods shall persist through any career move. I'll live my hobolife less suburban. Less easy. Less middle class. More impoverished student. I think I decided on a quit date for my job: June 23rd. It's the last friday in the second to last week of june.

Too poor to fuck.

2006-04-27T17:37:00.000-04:00

It's official.My pill just went up to fifty dollars. That's with my insurance. See, my insurance only covers generics for ortho products; I'm not on an ortho. I'm on yasmin. It's a lovely monophasic pill that comes in a fake purple suede cover and costs more than a gym membership, cable, my phone bill, or groceries.My nurse practitioner never told me why I'm on yasmin, and not what I was on

Ivy League Trash.

2006-04-26T20:31:00.000-04:00

My boyfriend and I walked around the east side of providence. We thought it would be fun to photograph things like this forty ounce malt liquor, which we found, just as pictured, nestled near the ivy-covered halls of Brown.Olde English 800. 40 ounces of escape, reasonably priced and available at package and convenience stores in neighborhoods much discussed, but never visited, by Brown

Third Acceptance In

2006-04-24T15:16:00.000-04:00

Drake University School of Law. Full scholarship. All three years. Why yes, I am planning to go to the only law school that didn't offer me a full scholarship. What do you think about that?

Women and children.

2006-04-23T11:55:00.000-04:00

Women and children. People can't seem to be able to differentiate between these groups. I'm watching a Penn and Teller show on legalizing prostitution. Most of the anti-prostitution groups seem to believe that if prostitution becomes legal, children will be forced into prostitution, or young girls will be forced into the lifestyle. A lot of the anti-legalization energy that does not confuse

My shower smells like baloney.

2006-04-20T20:29:00.000-04:00

this doesn't bother me.

When the zombies come.

2006-04-19T18:05:00.000-04:00

When the zombies come, many people will not realize what they are. Those people will get bitten quickly, and turned into zombies. This will be sad, as they go to bed at night, feeling slightly sore where that strange man bit them, saying goodnight to loved ones, and wake up with a terrible complexion and lust for blood.After those people, who didn't expect there to be zombies, become zombies,

Know what I haven't had in a long time?

2006-04-18T19:12:00.000-04:00

Lobster pie. Normally I'm against recipes that disguise expensive foods- truffle mashed potatoes, lobster neuburg, crab quesadillas. But lobster pie, a relic, not of jaded chefs seeking novelty, but thrifty new englanders stretching ingredients, and eating something previously thought of as inferior bait. As is common knowledge, lobsters were once so cheap, only the poorest and most

Another easter at work: Uneccessary Post About Penis Size

2006-04-16T22:36:00.000-04:00

I worked today. I've worked, now, since starting my current job- Three easters. Two christmases. Two christmas eves. Two thanksgivings. Two halloweens.And countless arbor days. It was dead tonight. Mostly it's busy on holidays. Next to the pharmacy, we're the only thing in the neighborhood open on holidays. The first thanksgiving we were open, we sold more milk and cream than coffee. My

Mysteries of Suburbia and Fat Children: Reprise

2006-04-16T00:01:00.000-04:00

So. I have no time right now.(then why are you blogging?)(shut up)So I've been eating off the fat of the land. I live in a suburb, so the fat of the land comes wrapped in paper and handed through the window of my car. Tonight I went to KFC. By the benificence of Yum Brands, my local KFC is also a Taco Bell. Being naturally perverse, I can't order just KFC, or just Taco Bell, or any rational,

My shoulder hurts.

2006-04-13T21:16:00.000-04:00

It looks like, because I like to make poor decisions (good decisions), I will end up going more than 100,000 in debt to go to law school.Whee. So if I seem a little more resentful than usual, that's why.There was a rally/protest/thingie on campus the other day. It was about the high cost of higher education. Massachusetts is one of the only states in the nation without a public or semi public law

I broke a hundred posts.

2006-04-12T16:59:00.000-04:00

My hundredth post was titled "Show Me Your Pussy"Which, I think, sums up the entire purpose of this blog. Stranger's vaginas, and what should and shouldn't be done in and around them.Temple, by the way, sucked. A lot.A LOT. It was like....I can't even describe.Sucked.

It is hard not to hate people.

2006-04-10T00:02:00.000-04:00

Especially when looking at real estate ads in Boston. It's hard not to think that all landlords are selfish, price-gouging carpetbaggers, when looking at real estate ads in Boston. It's not that everyone wants to live in a few good neighborhoods, or wants specific amenities, like dishwasher or screen porch or covered parking. It's that people want a place to live. And landlords weep that it's

2006-04-05T20:46:00.000-04:00

<===Inspired by this guy. I've decided to write a list of ten movies that must be seen. I do not claim, as he wouldn't, that they are all good, nor do I claim that there is any sort of redeeming value, as I'm sure he wouldn't. But, as he's probably equally unlikely to claim with his list, some of them contain some qualities that resemble...well-done, thoughtful, filmmaking and screenwriting.

Show me your pussy!

2006-04-04T22:37:00.000-04:00

Actually, please don't. But my friend made me a cd with that song on it, so it's in my head. It came on as I was driving my mom to the grocery store. She laughed. So there's this court case that was in the news the other day; they called it Roe v. Wade for men. Which is mostly bullshit. In this case, a woman who said she could not get pregnant had sex with a man who did not want to get her

The Death Of Romance

2006-04-02T19:35:00.000-04:00

Romance is dead.Or persistently vegetative.Either way, its time has past. And that's fine.It's cute to pretend that sweeping gestures, breathless vows, and hearts, flowers, and passionate self-sacrifice are not only relevant, but appropriate and effective methods of conducting sexual business contemporarily.It's also cute to pretend that a pretzel is a cigar, and your finger is a gun, but try

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

2006-03-29T21:03:00.000-05:00

But it exists. And it's not a big deal. But it is a quality that some women have and some women don't. It is a current myth, nearly as potent as "there is someone for everyone", that all women are beautiful.To those who genuinely believe that, I have one thing to say: Ride a fucking subway.One time. Not all women are beautiful. And it's fine. The current myth, the current platitude, the current

Non-traditional students.

2006-03-29T18:35:00.000-05:00

Depending on where you go to school, the words "Non-traditional" mean different things. If you're in western massachusetts or the pacific northwest, it means someone who smokes a lot of marijuana, dresses inappropriately for their gender, and designed their own major to incorporate their twin passions: ceramics and maoism, from a post-foucalt psuedo-neo-modernist perspective, and expects to

Second Acceptance in

2006-03-29T18:22:00.000-05:00

and they've offerred me 25,500. Total.So, in the scheme of things, not so much. I'd really rather go there than anywhere, though. It has many lovely points, such as co-op program focus on public service wouldn't have to move to Philadelphia, which, rumor has it, smells like pee and is near new jersey. could move out of my apartment, quit my job, and still not be homeless. but I also

I have two papers due tomorrow.

2006-03-23T19:11:00.000-05:00

One on ketamine therapy treatment for opiate addiction, and one as a systems analysis of the family structure in the movie "The Royal Tennenbaums".So I'm drinking hot chocolate and scratching my hives.Temple offered me a full scholarship.

Two basic principles of reciprocity.

2006-03-21T09:37:00.000-05:00

There are two basic principles in life that can be depended on for comfort in states of extreme annoyance: If someone does something that drives you absolutely fucking up the wall, even the extent that if you're subjected to it for one more moment you're going to start doing harm to yourself in order to overload your psychic pain with physical pain, it is almost guaranteed that you are

That was a trick question, by the way.

2006-03-20T10:04:00.000-05:00

"Baby Got Back" is about class, not gender...leaving "Push it" as the default document of female liberation. Yo, baby papi.

Something to think about

2006-03-19T23:13:00.000-05:00

and discuss with your family. Is "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix-a-lot a more positive message about female sexuality and self image than "Push it" by Salt N Peppa?

First Acceptance In: Temple University

2006-03-18T18:11:00.000-05:00

By email, no less.They want me to go to Philly next week for the accepted students' weekend. Can't go. Painting faces. Two year anniversary of the opening of my cafe. Fun times, guys. I hate children.

Working on the front lines of the coffee (culture) wars

2006-03-17T10:57:00.000-05:00

I'm your pusher man.Or I'm not. Depending on how you like your coffee.Actually, not.Let's drop the pretense, why not? Bitches? Beuller? Let's not pretend that the coffee war is more than tangentially about coffee. It's about class. It's about money. It's about identity. And let's not just pretend that there are just two players. How about about the third group of combatents, the morally

Rage

2006-03-16T14:15:00.000-05:00

A good friend of mine got his first law school rejection yesterday. This system is fucked up. The LSATs matter more than everything else combined; except that they don't. Grades, reccommendations, essay- if you don't have the LSAT's, fuck you. Of course, because the whole world wants to go to law school now, LSATS only get you into the door. And if I don't have the grades and the reccommendations

I don't want to be an adult for a while.

2006-03-15T22:02:00.000-05:00

I really don't. Spring break has been too much for me. I've slept late. I've had dinner at my parent's house. I've gone out, and stayed out late. Before I got to stop and breathe for a while, I was just pushing through everything so hard (and driving myself and other people crazy) that I didn't even notice what I'm putting myself through. I want someone else to do the cooking and the bill

"Dumb, useless, fugly skank"

2006-03-13T19:45:00.000-05:00

How would you describe someone you didn't like? Weeks ago, a coworker said that the way it's done in her part of the world (American Samoa) is to say "I don't know (that person) very well." My sainted grandmother would say "She does the best she can." If someone was really blindingly stupid on top of it all, she would say "She means well". If my grandmother wanted to indicate that the

Strange little compulsion...

2006-03-13T11:09:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, I found out that I make 40 cents an hour less than my most analogous coworker. Ever since, instead of going to the cafe where I work for a cup of coffee (more likely a triple espresso), I've been going to Dunkin' Donuts.I've been getting a Dunkin' Donuts, medium french vanilla. It's not good coffee. It's not even consistent. But it's comfort food. And, it's turned into my way of

Weird things I eat.

2006-03-08T23:04:00.000-05:00

I must eat certain foods only when they are symmetrical. McDonald's Egg McMuffins- The canadian bacon slice must be shifted to the other side of the egg from the cheese. Because the ham and the cheese are both mainly sweet and salty, and the egg is mainly savory and sour. So the ham and the cheese must be separated. Cupcakes- if no one is watching, I must split the cupcake down the middle,

Let's make a separation, kiddies.

2006-03-08T09:35:00.000-05:00

Lets! It'll be ever so fun!Lets devise a test to see whether pro-lifers are actually pro-life, anti-abortion, or anti-sex- or a combination of both! Let's have some..How would we possibly begin to determine whether a person's concern was truly in saving the lives of beings that they consider equal, in every way, and morally equivalent to, an adult human?And how would we determine whether a person

$1545

2006-03-07T20:32:00.000-05:00

That's my expected yearly contribution to my legal education. Yes, I'm poor. Very, very poor. And this time, it makes me win. I encountered a quote that sums up, nearly perfectly, why I'm going to law school. I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. My sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy, geography, natural history,

sunt lacrimae rerum...

2006-03-06T22:18:00.000-05:00

There seem to be times in life when the past feels closer and more vivid than in other times. I've been walking in a fog of quasi-nostalgia (know what's a fucked up concept? Ostalgie. Hey, remember the time when the secret police killed your uncle? And there was no toilet paper for 20 years?) There's no longing for times past, but the moments of years ago carry this intoxicating salience... I

And my bit...Emergency Contraception.

2006-03-01T21:35:00.000-05:00

A while ago, I began an investigation into the target boycott.Here's a recap and analysis. Don't mind me if I repeat myself- this is a combination of notes and crushed up freelance pieces and parts of my law school personal statement. It has a lot of research I didn't fully get into here.This past fall, Planned Parenthood of America urged people to boycott Target scores. This boycott was inspired

Very, very important.

2006-03-01T21:21:00.000-05:00

If you think you're a feminist, if you think you're pro-choice, you must read thisThis is the most important bit of feminist writing I've ever read. This is practical. This is political. This is personal.I am not, as you recall, any kind of traditional feminist. I am, however, rabidly pro-choice. In fact, I'm pro-abortion. This woman details, completely, how to perform an abortion.If Roe is

Dirty, Sanctimonious Motherfuckers.

2006-02-21T22:30:00.000-05:00

Fucking salon readers. Fucking salon.Salon has an interview with a woman who wrote a book about how tough it is, economically, to be young right now. And, predictably, there's a fucking firestorm of letters about how it's not tough to be young now, and everyone else has had to walk up hill two ways in the snow to work at McDonalds for a bundle of sticks and twigs.Bullshit.Let me tell you the

That guy.

2006-02-21T20:54:00.000-05:00

He's pretty great, actually. He's tall. He laughs with me. Even when it's not funny. Even when it's just so I'm not laughing alone. It's a great laugh. Nothing high and squeaky, nothing with a guffaw. It's pretty great. He's got these brownish eyes. Hazel for real, not like mine, which are lies. Perfect eyebrows. Smile with no fangs. He gives me all the little things without thinking. He lets me

Where have I been?

2006-02-14T22:29:00.000-05:00

Well, I've been busy.I've been applying to law school. What a fucking pain. I've been doing a lot of work, trying to graduate. And I've been working for very low compensation. I've been, basically, not myself.I've never been a busy person. I've always been the person who managed to have free time when everyone else was hiding out, camping under textbooks, working too much. This may be why I

Let's bring back an age-blind labor system!

2006-01-23T19:22:00.000-05:00

Just look at these happy, productive members of society!Do they look exploited to you? Those chubby cheeks, those shoeless feet, those hollow, soulless eyes that know naught of childhood.Age-appropriate productive labor has long been a vital part of practical education in every society around the world.Idle childhood is a modern abberation that may just be destroying our society. Ridding cities

The Muddy Concupiscence of the Flesh

2006-01-20T12:15:00.000-05:00

A friend of mine doesn't want to watch sexualized violence anymore. It's a stance shared by many.Not the Japanese.Or the Germans.But many.The sexual impulse, and the sexual act, is a biological one. It's also psychologically evocative. Sexual behavior is a product both of instinct and of culture, of drive and of pleasure. In that way, sex is like eating. It contains the potential to express all

Meta-foods.

2006-01-12T17:29:00.000-05:00

So velveeta got me thinking.Some of the most popular foods out there are symbols of food, rather than food itself. Sure, they contain thebasic components of food- fats, complex carbohydrates, minerals, simple sugars, msg, maltitol, sprinkles...but they, themselves, are symbols of and substitutes for, other culinary experiences.Take a product my roommate is quite fond of: Chik Patties. She loves

Uncultured cheese.

2006-01-02T22:37:00.000-05:00

I'd like to talk about circumcision today.There's a Velveeta commercial that runs frequently on the Food Network, Discovery Health, and other networks that cater to women and the insincere idle. It's cartoon-bright, but live action. There is a very catchy jingle, set to the hokey pokey, that exhorts you to "Put Velveeta in/Leave the Cheddar out/With lumpy, oily cheddar, who KNOWS what will come

An article

2006-01-01T18:12:00.000-05:00

Obviously written by a woman who comes easily from oral sex and clitoral stimulation.Women's orgasms aren't elusive...women's orgasms aren't elusive...It's the same go-girl-pro-clitshit that women have been fed from cosmo and ms. and glamour and everywhere. If you're not having orgasms, you're down with the patriarchy. If you're having penetrative intercourse, and expecting to enjoy it...you're a

A solution to the abortion debate.

2006-01-01T17:29:00.000-05:00

The problem with the abortion debate right now is that it's stale.It is. You've got my side, insisting that bodily sovereignty is a human right, and the other side, insisting that anything that can be even broadly defined as a human life should not be killed. And they're at a standstill, each trying to force into legislative concrete what is really a philosophical position. Of course, my side is

Meditation on "Memoirs of a Geisha"

2005-12-28T22:34:00.000-05:00

I saw 'Memoirs of a Geisha' with a friend of mine yesterday. Decent movie. Very atmospheric. Unlike Kingdom of Heaven, the careful cinematography and art direction was backed up with a plot and character development. In fact, the cinematography even enhanced the plot. Which was nice.There was one shot in particular, where just the interaction of acting, lighting, and camera angles appeared to

I think I have an inferiority complex.

2005-12-28T22:27:00.000-05:00

I'll mail a roll of pennies to the first person who supplies me with the originator of that term. It's in my notes, but why not skip a step?But my roommate bought that charmin ultra toilet paper. It's so thick and soft and cushy. They should get rid of those fat-bottomed bears and go to a simpler ad campaign. On a black screen, in mid-sized, serifless font, it should say: Charmin Ultra: The kiss

Underused Nicknames for US States

2005-12-27T00:10:00.000-05:00

Alabama : The Touch-Me StateAlaska: Girls! Girls! Girls!Arizona: America's ChumbucketCalifornia: PotsylvaniaColorado: ColoraddyConnecticutt:GrandmaDelaware: SmellawareFlorida: Laos on the AtlanticLouisiana: The thinking man's TennesseeNew Jersey: The Garden StateNew Hampshire: Lil' SmokeyNew Mexico: Old CanadaNew York: Happy Sockmore later

Lesser known facts about women

2005-12-26T22:56:00.000-05:00

That can be discerned from the feminine hygiene aisle at CVS.True: Women like to smell like food. They will buy nearly anything that will make them smell either like a salad course or a dessert. The dessert part has been known for decades. The salad course is a more recent innovation. It began with skin products containing avacado and cucumber, for their cooling properties. Now women will pay

Fat Children vs. Fat Puppies- A reprise

2005-12-26T10:18:00.000-05:00

Even on christmas, I hatebut I love...not a big fan of...but I'm pretty keen on

I have a theory.

2005-12-24T00:08:00.000-05:00

Women experience love by doing; Men experience love by feeling.So when I feel completely unloved and rejected because someone doesn't do something for me that I'd try to do for them, it's all mistranslation.And this could be evolutionary. Men, to most efficiently propagate the species, would have to feel sufficient sexual attraction for a partner to facilitate intercourse, sufficient attachment

The Boston Celtics

2005-12-18T22:11:00.000-05:00

In order by how much I'd like to see them naked.1. (Tied)Marcus Banks (Tied)Tony Allen Very tough call. But I feel like Marcus won't be a Celtic long. Who knows where he'll go. And who wants to see a Knick or a Net or a Wizard naked? Not me. Not now. But Tony Allen...the arms. The shoulders. The back. The legs. It's obvious what I need to complete this picture. 2. Ricky Davis I just...

Ephemera

2005-12-18T20:06:00.000-05:00

1. King KongGood movie. A wonderful depression era psychological tale about a girl with daddy issues and an ape with abandoment issues.Watch out for: People telling you the movie is about interacial love. It's not. If everytime you see a 25 foot gorilla, you see a black man, you are a racist. Learn to tell the difference. And, if every time you see a gorilla, you see a black man, does that mean

People keep telling me not to be a lawyer!

2005-12-15T17:39:00.000-05:00

Goddamnit, it's not about what I want to do. It's about possibilities, and apptitudes, and doors. It's not about dreams and wishes and childhood.I'm 23 years old. My breasts are 2 inches lower, at their lowest point, braless, than they were when I started college for the first time, 7 years ago. I've got grey streaks, heating bills, and three tubes of steriod creme to keep the skin on my hands on

Mmm...research.

2005-12-11T16:40:00.000-05:00

My life has become research. Between the emergency contraception thing (where the research is done) and a long paper for my research methods class, I've been living my life inside databases. My plans for the future- sleep, reading fiction, and basically rotting my brain. But, for now, it's fun. I actually like it. I swear. I wish I had a hamburger.

This is getting weird.

2005-11-30T20:18:00.000-05:00

The earlier I search, the less information I find about this incident in Fenton, Mo. And the more I look at news sources rather than advocacy groups, the more ambiguity and contradiction I find. Please, planned parenthood- do not turn out to be manufacturing scandal where none existed before. That's totally what the other side does. FUCK.From Saveroe.com on 10/27/05"A 26-year-old Missouri woman

What's going on in Missouri

2005-11-30T19:56:00.000-05:00

So I've been doing more research. I did a lexis-nexis search of newspapers from MO, looking for newspaper articles about what actually happened in the Fenton incident. I haven't found one yet that tells me what happened AFTER the phamacist refused the prescription (it was a paper one), and BEFORE the media shitstorm. But I did find this, in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. Group forms to fight

Hey, did you notice?

2005-11-30T14:55:00.000-05:00

All the big corporations replied, but not planned parenthood.I feel...snubbed.

Pharmacy Procedures (How a scrip becomes a pill)

2005-11-27T22:02:00.000-05:00

If I had time tonight, I would write this in the style of schoolhouse rock. Yet, I don't. I'm supposed to be writing a paper for my Psychology of Personality class.So, doing research, talking to people with views different than mine, and people in the pharmacy industry, I've been able to isolate a reason for this whole dang EC thing. The claim is that filling a prescription is so much more

Hobobarista's EC Coverage.

2005-11-25T16:51:00.000-05:00

As if there are more than four people who have ever read this blog- (P, R, R, N, M- maybe five of you), I'm still going to do a little link-n-sum of my personal Plan B brigade.Basically, here's what's going on. On 11/01/05, Dan Savage wrote, in his column "Savage Love" of a dispute between Planned Parenthood and Target. It seems a pharmacist in a Fenton, MO Target refused to fill a 26 year old

CVS Replies

2005-11-25T14:29:00.000-05:00

Dear (Hobo Barista):Thank you for contacting us about our prescription filling policies.At CVS/pharmacy, we are committed to helping people live longer,healthier, happier lives. In pursuing that goal, our pharmacists workhard to ensure that our customers' prescription needs are promptly andcompletely satisfied.We remain committed to providing reasonable accommodations to ourpharmacists that have

Walgreens Replies

2005-11-22T16:45:00.000-05:00

November 22, 2005Dear (Hobobarista),Thank you for taking your time to contact our Corporate Offices. Weappreciate hearing from ourcustomers and value all comments received.Thank you for sharing your opinion with us in regard to dispensing ofcontraceptive medication by ourpharmacists. Walgreens believes it has an obligation to meet the medicalneeds of all of its patients. Wealso believe we have

What we're afraid to say about sex

2005-11-22T13:50:00.000-05:00

So there's the hpv vaccine.There's emergency contraception.There's abstinence only sex education.And there are teenagers.The HPV vaccine has been shown to be effective against Human Papilloma Virus (Genital Warts). HPV has been shown to be a cause of cervical cancers in young women. And yet there's a push-back against it. It is believed that parents wouldn't want their daughters vaccinated, for

KMart declines to reply.

2005-11-21T12:23:00.000-05:00

Dear (Hobobarista),Thank you for contacting Kmart.Regretfully, we are unable to assist you with your request through thisdepartment. Please contact your local Kmart pharmacy for furtherassistance.To locate the closest Kmart pharmacy, please visit www.kmart.com and clickon the store finder link located in the upper right of every page.We appreciate your inquiry and apologize for any

Brooks Replies

2005-11-21T09:31:00.000-05:00

Dear Brooks Pharmacy Customer - As healthcare professionals, our pharmacists' primary objective is to provide our patients with superior health information and unmatched standards of care. Our company position is that our pharmacists comply with the policies and procedures to ensure that appropriate care is delivered to our patients. This prohibits a pharmacist from refusing to fill a

Target, continued.

2005-11-20T20:07:00.000-05:00

I really don't feel as if that letter told the whole story.But I really, really need to be able to buy a three-pack of underpants for $3.46 without going to Wal-Mart.I hate Wal-Mart.Let's have some honesty. I don't hate them for their recent healthcare scandal. Nor for the elitist traditional reasons of suburban sprawl, decimated town centers, the homogenization of America, musical censorship,

Target Replies.

2005-11-16T15:12:00.001-05:00

Dear Target Guest In our ongoing effort to provide great service to our guests, Target consistently ensures that prescriptions for the emergency contraceptive Plan B are filled. As an Equal Opportunity Employer, Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 also requires us to accommodate our team members’ sincerely held religious beliefs. In the rare event that a pharmacist’s beliefs

Slate wants to redesign college.

2005-11-16T09:16:00.000-05:00

Of course, they asked academics how.Charming.And each academic insisted on greater emphasis on their own particular dick to jerk axe to grind.A History and Germanic studies teacher wants more grammar and respect for professor's experiences. A co-director of a disability studies program wants more disability studies. Everybody wants more liberal arts and philosophy.Why? Because that's what makes

Slate Dropped The Ball. (In My Pants)

2005-11-12T09:06:00.000-05:00

Oh, slate. Oh you wacky bunch of folks!You fucked up, buckaroos. Your jeans piece missed the mark, bigtime. You can't talk about jeans without talking like class. You can't, really, talk about clothes without talking about class; but especially not jeans.Designers did not just declare jeans socially correct, and thus they were, into infinity. That's an oversimplification, Designers recognized a

It's so hard to have a principle.

2005-11-09T19:25:00.000-05:00

I need a breadbox.My kitchen would be so much more organized if I had a breadbox. Further; I want this breadboxBut it comes from Target.Goddamn. It's so cute and I could put my bread in it. And when people asked where bread was, I could say "in my shiny red box, motherfucker".To Do:Force Target to give up shameful practice, buy breadbox, invite friends over for bread and leave them wondering

Zombies

2005-11-07T20:51:00.000-05:00

People don't believe me when I say that I feel like the zombies are coming.They think I'm being hipper than thou, ironic, whatever.But I wake up, sometimes at 4, 4:30 in the morning, stagger out to my car, and I'm scared. I really need to get into my car as fast as possible, assure myself there's nothing in the back seat, and lock the doors. Because today might be the day the zombies come.Of

International No-Panties Day to End Child Marriage

2005-11-06T22:31:00.000-05:00

Teenage girls and college coed types are offended by certain shirts offered by the retailer Abercrombie and Fitch. These shirts feature sayings such as "Available for Parties" and "I make you look fat" (Picture gallery linked from here). So, responding to pressure from the "girlcott" (how's that for a bubblegum neologism?), Abercrombie has pulled the offending shirts from their line.Homo homo

I like fat puppies, but I hate fat children.

2005-11-02T20:56:00.000-05:00

I like fat puppies.But I hate fat children.I likeand I likebut I hateandAgain, I lovebut I hateThank You. That is all.

Help Save Target!

2005-11-01T20:45:00.000-05:00

Save them by pissing them off, harassing them, and not allowing them a moment's peace, that is. Because I really want to continue shopping there.I read Savage Love every week as soon as it's available. This week, Dan Savage revealed something so dismaying about Target, my favorite source of shit to put on my couch, shit to put in my kitchen, shit to put on my floor, and jones soda. And the new

A recipe I'd like to share.

2005-10-31T12:30:00.000-05:00

It's getting time for casseroles, and warm things from the oven. Tomorrow I'm going to try to make baked ziti. But for now, here's a recipe I give to the world-Disgusting Tasty Casserole-(Spinach Sweet Potato Casserole) Two large white potatoes (any kind- waxy yellow or fluffy white will be fine) Two large sweet potatoes 5-10 strips bacon 1/2-1 lovely onion 1/2 c. cheese, shredded (fontina,

Barren Bitches Be Crazy

2005-10-30T23:50:00.000-05:00

So some dryin' up bitches be freezin' they eggs.Fertility is the catch in gender equality. It used to be too much fertility held women back. The pill fixed that. Women can fuck like men, and choose when to carry a pregnancy to the end. Unfortunately, contraception is too good when used well. Women who've chosen to delay childbearing are beginning to find that they've dosed themselves right

What it's like.

2005-10-30T22:01:00.001-05:00

I've never really been the normal girl.People think I'm really unconventional; I've been able to make my quirks skew more charming than queer. I don't know why I'm like this. I just know that I've never been able to quite manage being standard, in any way. I was precocious. I was bright. I was a well-spoken eight year old. I was academically extraordinary. I've always been able to achieve

Defending Lust as Sin

2005-10-16T14:17:00.000-04:00

So, lust. In the traditions of the Catholic Church, lust is a sin. There are two non-lustful uses for sex, and all others will send you to hell. You can have sex to- Create life (recently broadened to include having sex that is just open to the prospect of creating life. That's why even married Catholics can't use birth control- it turns sex (fine) into lust (sin). and to Cement the bonds

I've got to remember to blog about-

2005-10-11T08:49:00.000-04:00

thisandthisandthisIt's a doll-fucking, fur-wearing, generational slacking world out there. And I can't keep up.

My fucking customers.

2005-10-10T18:35:00.000-04:00

or"The Chrome off a Trailer Hitch: A catalogue of annoying choads, wankers, fockers, cunts, and so on who are absolutely welcome to never come back."By H. Barista 1. Carpet Salesman guy. Oh, carpet salesman guy. I know your name, but I'm not posting it here. Let it just be known, you suck. You suck so fucking much. You suck so much and so hard I'd love to replace that goddamned headset

Last Chance.

2005-10-03T11:26:00.000-04:00

Last chance to weigh in on whether I should add something stupid to my already packed schedule. The schedule wherein I have less than one day off a week. The schedule wherein I don't have time to poo. The schedule wherein I wish I had more time to work so I could afford more heat later on. The schedule wherein I don't have enough time to both attend class and do the work for it. The schedule

What the food in my fridge says about me (in bed)

2005-10-02T16:08:00.002-04:00

Inspired by an article on Nerve .In my fridge, right now, belonging to me:Diet Coke (two liter, flat)Eggs (one left of a six-pack, Eggland's Best)Peanut Butter (Teddy)Jam (Strawberry, smuckers, low sugar)Hummus (real old- I should toss it out)Frozen spinach (store brand, two packages)Butter (store brand, one stick)Mayonaise (Hellmans, in the upside-down bottle)Nonfat Milk (Store Brand)Chai Tea

A real feminist issue.

2005-09-27T12:37:00.000-04:00

I got a pap smear today. I hate getting pap smears.On the other side of the world, women wait in a hospital, some living in cardboard slums outside for months, waiting for an operation that will give them back their status as human beings.Status they'd never have lost as even the poorest, most oppressed western woman. These women suffer from fistulas , caused by inadequate or absent medical care