Goddamned Yuppie Bitch.

This cunt is what's ruining Boston.

This cunt is what's fucking up the suburbs, too.

This cunt is what's making it impossible for people my age to become adults.

This cunt is a motherfucking real estate speculator. She buys a property, and, as the article so cutely puts it "flips" it. She's soooo anxious about getting in while the market is still "hot".

What's this cunt really doing?

This cunt is taking affordable housing stock, valuable multi-family rental property that communities won't zone for anymore (rentals being oh-so-gauche, oh-so-unpleasant! and the ELEMENT they bring in! Why, they're barely upper-middle-class at all!) adding cheap little touches like countertops and shiny woodwork, condoing it, and taking all the profit back to her tony little McMansion.

This cunt is why I live in a one-bedroom, with a roommate, and consider myself lucky for the privelege. This is why I don't KNOW anyone my age, except for my roommate, who doesn't live with their parents. Well, this cunt, and a bunch of other cunts with other tricks up their sleeves.

How about working mommy cunts, who take all their earnings and use them in bidding wars to drive up housing prices in school districts where little Shamison will get the opportunities she needs to play lacrosse and learn french and score well on the MCAS and never meet any black people.

How about snob zoning cunts, who love to cut up parcels that can only be used for sprawling 5-bed, 4-bath, 3 motherfucking car garage MANOR HOUSES, and refuse to zone any more multi-family housing?

How about all the cunts who condo to keep out college students, all the college student cunts whose mommies and daddies pay absolutely anything in rent to save on room and board, thus pushing the rental market even higher?

How about cunty cities that sleeze out of 40B requirements? How about cunty 40B requirements that don't actually create any affordable housing?

But this cunt...oooooo. This cunt. And this paper. Boston Globe, theoretically a liberal, thoughtful paper, read by nearly everyone in the city, shamelessly congratulating this cunt on getting hers. Yes, she certainly will turn a profit on this. But where does the profit come from? Money always comes from somewhere, cunt. It comes from everyone below her.

It comes from the shameless shlubs who buy the condo, who'd rather buy a house but can't afford it. It comes from the former tenants she probably pushed out of their insufficiently tasteful, but probably sufficiently affordable housing. It comes from everyone who can't find a place to live in a city preyed on by goddamned yuppie cunt speculators.

Lady, listen to me. I don't care that you want to make money. We all want to make money. Some day, I'd like to have some. I'll touch it and stroke it and put it under my pillow. And sure, you like playing the real estate game. And really, the people who buy your condos will get something out of the deal. Maybe they'll even be worthless yuppies like yourself. But there is a way to take advantage of like-minded yuppie trash without degrading affordable housing stock. Sure, it's a little HARDER, and it's a little more TECHNICAL (math make mommies head hurt?), but it doesn't take advantage of a situation that is currently strangling everyone making less than 60,000 a year. See, lady, what you do, is you find some shitty old mill buildings. Then you pump your stainless-steel and knockoff corian into there like it was going out of style (and it will). You make loft condos. You create new housing stock for your worthless, hyperpriveleged n-riche brethren. Draw them into the artful former ghetto.

And leave the falling down-triple deckers to us poor people, cunt.